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i left a piece of my heart in philippines
Friday, December 30, 20054:14 AM

i suddenly feel very strange after this year's Philippines mission trip... its as though a part of my heart has been left there. i definitely DID NOT feel this way last year. after this year's trip, i feel more convicted to help the filipino people, reach out to them... Philippines, or more specifically, Novalivches, is like a home to me now, it seems... unflushable toilets, super ice-cold baths, the mud & dust of the roads... who cares really? i was thinking of coming back again next year, and staying longer, like 2-3 weeks... 8 days is DEFINITELY not enough.. but this is only if God's willing...

i think another reason why i feel weird is cos of adrian... he's so nice & friendly & all... im afraid im falling for him (more like tripping). so ridiculous isn't it? but im quite worried... last year, i wasn't worried about not seeing the same faces again the next year... but since i came back this year, at least 3/4 of the children & youth i saw were new faces... auntie dina, jonah & jemima are gone, for undisclosed reasons, gary, connie archie and many more are gone to who knows where... so im pretty worried about not seeing my new friends again next year, like mary grace and jonathan... but still its good to see old faces like john michael and rolly and jofel again...

i wonder if i'll still see them again next year, if i do come back... of cos, adrian included... aw man this is bad... im obsessing over a guy i hardly know and who lives more than 7 hours away from me (including time from home to changi airport: 1hr, singapore to manila:4 hrs, manilan airport to auntie flor's house: 2-3 hrs... not to mention the 'waiting' at customs & immigration... aw man...)

omg i still can't believe he's 19 ok??? he was the tagalog interpreter for dr lim (and part time torch bearer), & i was juggling roles between being a scrubber and the dental assistant for dr lim. just nicely during one of the dental/medical ministry days, we were having small talk over (as in standing over) a dental patient, and i asked him his age. "im 19 years old" came the reply. i dropped the mini-torch on (or next to, or on the floor) the dental patient and stared at him, mouth wide & all... "whoops sorry sorry pai seh..." i bent over to get the torch. even dr lim was laughing at my reaction ok... she too, couldn't help but assume he was my age... i mean, come on, he's not much taller than me (at the most 160cm) and has that funny boyish 15 or 16 year old look on his face... can't be blamed...

but im so sad!!! i missed the chance to get a photo with him... what's wrong with me??? im so living in Idiotcity man... i think i'll just get his pic from dot, only that its with her face :( at leats i wrote him a christmas card... hopefully eric cire (pronounced 'sire') will remember to pass it to him... and hopefully he isn't too shocked about the part where i told him i sorta like him. oh oh, and thanks to wen e, the toy penguin i bought from philippines has a new name thats totally appropriate: a****n. you go guess... hahax... :) oh and another thing: he's part chinese, has a chinese name and knows a *little* bit of mandarin... cool huh? and his english's pretty fluent too hahax... ok i should stop obsessing now...


p.s: this entry was originally written on a receipt and a piece of paper on the airplane flight back to singapore TR503. why am i typing this fact down? nothing much actually... just the SENTIMENTAL VALUE of it thats all...

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