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BarTENDERS ;

designer.
pictorials.
software.
nightmare
Thursday, August 31, 200611:21 PM

i had a dream
i saw you dying
die
i couldn't help you
couldn't cry
couldn't scream

stood at the side
kissed you lightly
then watched you die
with my eyes opened wide


maybe its fear
maybe its anxienty
to lose someone dear
maybe im just going crazy

forget it
for now i'll live life
with you in it
and cherish every moment faithfully =]

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me and you
Wednesday, August 30, 20065:45 AM

i dreamt of me and you
no wait
i dreamt of me hurting you
and it was scary



i drowned you in my tears
strangled you quietly
made you consume my fears
on my behalf

you took the hurting end of my pain
willingly swallowed it
delicate doll of porcelain
how could i?

i walked away
when i made a mistake
saying i'd tell you another day
hanging up the phone when i wanted to call for help

for you i'll fake a smile
make you happy
and keep you going for awhile
let you know you have someone to turn to

you don't need to know the tears i cry at night
i don't want to worry you
everyday's a little fight
but you don't need to know that



so for now i'll stand strong
embrace pain with joy
i know it's wrong
but its fine with me- as long as you're alright =]

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so screwed
Tuesday, August 29, 20066:34 AM

okayy like i am so dead... i just flushed the easiest parts of my prelims down the toilet and into the sewer... just great...

hmmm lets see... chem/bio pracs were on like 25th of this month (did i rmb correctly???), friday... well obviously i didn't study much for chem cos the whole list of cations, anions & gases r given to you so no point wasting my precious brain cells over it when i can use it for something better right? so yeah i studied pretty well for bio prac instead =]

well guess what? surprise surprise IM STILL GONNA FLOP BOTH PRACTICALS!!! like for chem... i heated the stupid blue crystals n this smelly yellowish-brown gas came out... tested it with blue litmus n it turned it red... okayy so the results weren't as exact as expected but yeah its lab stuff we're talking here its bound to be a lil screwed in one way or another lols... so i just estimated n the closest answer i could get was chlorine gas... guess what? the answer was NITROGEN DIOXIDE. like hello we've never done the test for that gas before! how would we freakin know???

n bio... it was THE BEST. seriously. our dear teacher kept giving us hints to study for food tests n plant related stuff... so obviously we'd mug n focus like crazy for them right? in the end what came out was the most unexpected thing: the EYE. for goodness sakes. the EYE. its so NOT related to the stuff she hinted at us to study for... well obviously food tests came out... its like as ESSENTIAL for bio pracs... ugh but i still cant get over the eye thing... my tutor n i were going thru the entire bio textbook n covering every single practical we could do... when it came to the chapter on the eyes, my tutor n i were laughing our heads off cos it seemed too weird n ridiculous to do... man the irony of life... -.-''

sighs my dear darling english prelims... even better still... screwed it all up down left right centre... i didnt write the addresses for the letter-writing component cos the reciepient was the sch principal, n i was supposed to be writing on behalf of my cca... so obviously if i were to write it on their behalf i'd write it in sch so we can discuss it, n just pop it into the principal's office right? what for write stupid addresses??? -.-'' its common-sensical...

n my composition... oh my... i hope ms tambunan's the one marking it... i dunno why but i'd just rather her mark it any day... i wrote on a topic thats so open i probably went over the line a lil bit... it was those kinda one-word topics that u can expand from n it was 'freedom'... yeah thats it just 'freedom'. i crapped on n on n even dragged stuff like perspective n irony in... man the worse thing is that though i like to deal with stuff like that, but to use it in an essay is like so wrong... i wonder what ms tambunan will make of it...

n my beloved comprehension n summary writing... another gone case... the passage on its own was kinda hard to deduce answers from... then i got this headbangingly hurting headache which later on affected my vision... i couldn't think properly n had this weird urge to puke... my shoulder blades n back began to hurt n i couldn't breathe properly... i started to perspire n stop every 5 mins then start again n it was so super irritating... ughs hope my compre n summary come out okay despite all that crap...

sighs oh well gotta go cos dad's making so much noise n its making my head hurt even more than it already is... all the best to me n 4e1 for our remaining prelims =/

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-Gomenasai-
Monday, August 28, 20067:51 AM

What i thought wasnt mine
In the light
Wasnt one of a kind
A precious pearl

When i wanted to cry
I couldnt
Cause i wasnt allowed

Gomenasai
For everything
Gomenasai
I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now


What I thought I was a note
So innocent
Was a delicate doll
Of Porcelain

When I wanted to call you
And ask you for help
I stopped myself

Gomenasai
For everything
Gomenasai
I know I let you down
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now

What I thought was a dream
A mirage
Was as real as it seemed
A privilege

When I wanted to tell you
I made a mistake
I walked away

Gomenasai
For everything
Gomenasai
Gomenasai
Gomenasai
I never needed a friend
Like I do now
Gomenasai
I let you down
Gomenasai
Gomenasai
Gomenasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now




-tatu-

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freaking out
Thursday, August 10, 200610:10 AM

oh hahax thank you fedora yeo [i forgot your chinese name lols] oh-so much for reminding me that tmr is the day that i get my chinese o level results back... yeah thanks so much babe -.-'' like how could i forget???

tmr i get an o level result back, take an o level result, and its cs's birthday as well... poor baby >.<

n the darn english oral exam... im like the 12th person n the last!!! so i have to like wait for the 11 people before me to freak out before i can freak out?!? n i have to watch everybody get fired at before i can get shot at cos im last in the firing line?!? ughs so unfair... the list doesnt seem to be in alphabetical order cos people with names starting with 'T' or even further down the alphabet r infront of me!!! *screams* no fair!!! n cs is like 2nd in line... argh n i wanted to celebrate her birthday with her... why must tmr be so crappy??? =[ RARHS

oh yes n to my dear mummy LeeCheeSan HAPPIE BIRTHDAY TO YOU =] happie sweet16 (if you consider the year you take your o's sweet) n look out for a birthday bash tmr... just in case =] so yeahs i still love u mum even though you're like a year OLDER now n thanks for going shopping with me yesterday! so loved it! <3>

n to everybody getting their results back tmr, hope for the best =] n to those taking the english orals tmr as well, all the best >.<

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say it RIGHT.